So I actually have life updates!!!!! I am super de dupery happy!!! I have a new boyfriend his name is Josh!!! Yeah he's pretty much amazing!!!!! I have NEVER had this much fun with someone or started falling this much for someone in this short of a time, but he is absolutely awesome!!!!! I am hoping things keep going well with him and continue to grow closer( dont know how much time it will take to get bugged by him cus it aint happened yet and I don't see it happening ever, we are together at THE VERY LEAST 12 hours a day or so) aside from my new found Josh. I am working at a photography studio *does happy dance* I couldn't be anymore happy, honestly I don't think I could!!!

french toast!!!


~the end

Hey everyone, WOw, usually when someone writes a journal and then reads it at a later date they kind of snicker at how bad or good things were and then say wow i can't believe how much changed...WELL I just read my previous journal and I can't say much has changed for me, actually things have gotten worse for me, I have been unemployed for 2 months now, me and my ex are not all hunkydory like we planned, i didn't go away for school, i cant sit in the same room with my mom or sister for more than a minute without fighting, I am getting physically sick from stress. I feel so helpless and useless, and like a bum, on top of it all I am heartbroken and shattered inside, I don't like being like this, I am ALWAYS the happy bubbley one of my friends, how can I be the one becoming like this, I am supposed to be the happy one who cheers everyone up. One good thing has happened, my friend Amanda moved in, I was scared at first of living with someone, but I am SO glad its her, anyone else I think I would be dying but I really like living with her, we have fun. I just keep praying for things to get better here soon, hopefully they will SOON. UGH I need to go eat food now because I haven't today and its 6pm good bye, take a browse in my gallery too thanks







This is my previous journal entry if you missed it...
Well, There is SOO much going on in my life right now. I don't even know if I can get it all down in a making sense order. Me and my mate of 8 and a half months just broke up, NO I don't want pitty, it was mutual, we have our reasons, nothing ended on a bad note we still love and care about eachother unconditionally but we had too do this for ourselves. My mom and dad are moving into one of their rentals and I am living in the house we live in now, I NEED ROOM MATES, all this better yet they are moving on the weekend of my 19th b-day. which brings up another thing WHAT am I going to do for my b-day??? I FINALLY got accepted into Norther Arizona University, it took three months and an college algebra class later. WHICH I am failing miserably right now. Honestly things are falling apart right in front of me. I am hurting inside but I REALLY TRUELY am okay, for some reason I haven't cried too much I just can't find the pain to bring tears like I know it should, I am in peices right now inside. I know it will all be okay in the end, and if its not okay....well then its not the end. I am really living by that, and I am taking EVERYTHING day to day no matter how much it hurts. Friends aren't the same thing as high school I guess this is growing up, sucks but we all have to do it at some point, it just kills me because its ALL at once with in two weeks of eachother.I am very tired and exhausted right now, I need sleep I have work in the morning. Good Night

Well, There is SOO much going on in my life right now. I don't even know if I can get it all down in a making sense order. Me and my mate of 8 and a half months just broke up, NO I don't want pitty, it was mutual, we have our reasons, nothing ended on a bad note we still love and care about eachother unconditionally but we had too do this for ourselves. My mom and dad are moving into one of their rentals and I am living in the house we live in now, I NEED ROOM MATES, all this better yet they are moving on the weekend of my 19th b-day. which brings up another thing WHAT am I going to do for my b-day??? I FINALLY got accepted into Norther Arizona University, it took three months and an college algebra class later. WHICH I am failing miserably right now. Honestly things are falling apart right in front of me. I am hurting inside but I REALLY TRUELY am okay, for some reason I haven't cried too much I just can't find the pain to bring tears like I know it should, I am in peices right now inside. I know it will all be okay in the end, and if its not okay....well then its not the end. I am really living by that, and I am taking EVERYTHING day to day no matter how much it hurts. Friends aren't the same thing as high school I guess this is growing up, sucks but we all have to do it at some point, it just kills me because its ALL at once with in two weeks of eachother.I am very tired and exhausted right now, I need sleep I have work in the morning. Good Night

What does next year have in store for me?
TNT-AC/DC

What does your love life look like?
Not Ready to make Nice-Dixie chicks

What do I say when life gets hard?
I write Sins Not Tragdies- Panic at the Disco

What do I think when I get up in the morning?
Dirty little secret- All American Regects..(odd)

What song will I dance to at my wedding?
Here we Go - NSYNC (I THINK NOT)

What do you want as a career?
Kerosene- Miranda Lambert

Your favorite saying?
Homewrecker- Gretchen Wilson

Favorite place?
Summer Time-Kenny Cheseney

What do you think of your parents?
Heart in a Blender- Eve 6

Where would you go on a first date?
Somewhere over the rainbow-punk cover (HAHA)

Drug of choice?
Pretty Fly (for a white guy)- Offspring

Describe yourself:
Who I am Hates Who I've Been- Relient K

What is the thing I like doing most?
Born to be Wild

The song that best describes the president?
If that aint country- anthony smith


What is my state of mind like at the moment?
with arms wide open-Creed (bull shit)

How will I die?
Hips dont lie- Shakira

The song you'll put as the subject?
My baby loves me just the way that i am- Martina McBride